Alanis Morrisette, a modern day Josef Mengele??

From Yahoo Music News

Alanis Morissette Says She Experimented With Women
01/23/2006 2:00 PM, Yahoo!

MusicLAUNCH Radio Networks
Alanis Morissette may be engaged to Canadian actor Ryan Reynolds, but that doesn't mean she didn't experiment with women during her teens and twenties. In a recent interview with Out magazine, Morissette revealed that although she considers herself heterosexual, she has been involved with women in the past, saying "I had my years of experimentation, which were very lovely and I'll highly recommend to anyone. I think it's such a beautiful rite of passage to test the waters and get a general sense of who you are and what your preferences are."
Morissette and Reynolds got engaged in 2004.
She's planning two projects this year -- a memoir and her next album.


Oh wait...she just hooked up with a couple chicks? Sorry, my bad.

Are ya like me? Do you hate those long ass url's

Try this site. Its pretty cool. Saves your friends from having to cut and paste long urls when you email them or post them.

I broke down....I have to admit it

My switch from Green Tea to Coffee has failed my friends. A couple days ago I went to my local Dunkin Donuts and bought a large coffee with cream and sugar. Since then I've been back on the wagon (or is it off the wagon?) drinking a large coffee every day. I'm still drinking the green tea, but I NEEDS my coffee. They say it takes 22 days to break a habit and start a new one. Well I made it about 18 days drinking green tea. Sorry self, but coffee is a sweet sweet mistress and she makes me feel good. Maybe next year.....

Conference Championship Picks

The Matchups:

Pittsburgh Steelers at Denver Broncos (-3.5)

Carolina panthers at Seattle Seahawks (-3.5)

Home field advantage is usually worth about 3 points, so it looks like the oddsmakers think these two matchups are pretty much dead even if you take away where the game is being played. I am gonna take both underdogs. I think Denver could win their game but it should be very close. Pittsburgh is a complete team that doesn't make a lot of mistakes. Look for a 24-21 game, but take Pittsburgh whichever way you think its gonna shake out.
I like Carolina +3.5 a lot. This defense is very active and the Carolina players on both sides of the ball know what a championship atmosphere is like. My overall record in the playoffs is a dead solid .500 (4-4) so I'll probably split these two but I'm feeling pretty strong about these two picks.

The guy who plays Doc House on "House" won a Golden Globe

I've never actually seen this show, but it looks like it sucks. Every commercial shows this doc House dude, and he's always in a bad mood about something. I wouldn't want this guy to be my doctor if he was always being rude to people. Why's he always so bent out of shape anyway?

3-1 against the spread this weekend

I did a better job with this weekend's games than last weekend. My 3-1 record this week brings me to 4-4 overall. I'll take the .500 record. Still got 3 games left to move above even.

Sadly, I was correct in picking Carolina, who beat my beloved Chicago Bears. The Bears did not have the offensive gameplan to win that game. Thomas Jones should have had 25 carries and Adrian Peterson should have had another 10 at least. They obviously gave up a lot more points on defense than anyone could have expected, but they came out throwing and continued all game. Part of the reason the d was so successful all year was that they controlled the ball pretty well on offense despite not scoring a lot of points. Very dissapointing game for this Bears fan. It's been 20 years since the team from a certain city which starts wit a C, ends wit an O, and in the middle is Hicag went to the Superbowl. Hopefully, it won't be another 20 years before they get there again.

This weekend's NFL playoff games

Ok, here are the spreads for the NFL playoff games:

1/14 Washington Redskins at Seattle Seahawks (-8.5)

1/14 New England Patriots at Denver Broncos (-3)

1/15 Pittsburgh Steelers at Indianapolis Colts (-9.5)

1/15 Carolina Panthers at Chicago Bears (-3)

And here are my picks:

I like Seattle despite the (-8.5) line. Washington put up a measly 120 yds last week in beating Tampa Bay. The skins easily could have lost that game if a couple bounces went the other way. I think Seattle has enough offense to put up points in the high 20's or low 30's and Washington should not score more than 17. Take Seattle.

I'm gonna go with the Patriots and take the 3 points. Can't bet against the Pats until somebody shows they can beat them in the playoffs.

I'll have to take Pittsburgh and the 9.5 points. That's just too many points to give considering Indianapolis's playoff record over the last 5 years. Indy could very easily win this game, but I think Pittsburgh's ball control offense will keep it close.

Despite my homerism for the Bears, I'm gonna take Carolina and the 3 points. Carolina looked very good last week on the road, albeit against a weak New York Giant defense and a playoff rookie qb. They play another playoff rookie qb in Rex Grossman this weekend and I look for Carolina to mix up some blitzes and try to take advantage of any playoff jitters on the part of Grossman. This should be a low scoring game, but I think Carolina wins by at least a field goal. Take the points and run to the bank.

PS these picks of course are for entertainment purposes only. I'm 1-3 so far in the playoffs so I wouldn't recommend using them for anything besides pure entertainment.

Jabberwacky

If you're ever bored and feel like chatting with an Artificial Intelligence computer program (an "AI bot") that is sometimes responsive (and sometimes not very) check this site out. For some reason (boredom?) it can be a little addicting to try to have a normal conversation with the thing.

Missed it by that much....

Video of a wannabe Evel Kinevel missing a bmx stunt by a couple of inches......Ouch.


By the way, google video is a godsend (at least the free videos are ie the popular section at the bottom of the page). Love those folks at google, wish I had gotten some of that stock when it IPOed.

Online University Degrees

Has anybody ever actually gotten one of these? If so is it worth the paper its printed on? Along the same line, do they even print your diploma for you or do you have to print that yourself? Is there an online graduation ceremony complete with boring speeches and beach balls bouncing around a virtual crowd? So many questions, so few answers.....

Eminem and Kim are gonna tie the knot again

Check it out.

"A month after announcing they were attempting to reconcile a volatile coupling that originally ended in divorce in 2001, the rap superstar and Kimberly Mathers have filed for a marriage license in their native Macomb County, Michigan, the Detroit Free Press reports.
Kimberly Mathers--who has kept the surname of her former husband, identified on the application by his legal name of Marshall Mathers III--submitted the paperwork Monday afternoon at the county clerk's office. The license was processed Tuesday and is expected to be picked up today. From that point, they will have 30 days to remarry."


One thing I like about Eminem...he's crazy. And I mean, like legitimately crazy, not just for the sake of shock value in order to sell cds. I respect that. He's written songs talking about killing Kim, and other songs talking about her sleeping with other dudes, now the two lovebirds are getting re-married. That my good friends, is pretty nuts....and I dig that about him.

Making the Switch from Coffee to Green Tea

I'm on Day 12 of an experiment. I stopped drinking coffee cold turkey on New Year's Eve and switched to green tea full time. For the first few days I had multiple headaches throughout the day, but that seems to have subsided. I was at least a 3 cup a day coffee drinker prior to this little experiment....Dunkin Donuts, I miss you!

I made the switch because I've heard a lot of good things about green tea's effects on metabolism as well as its (anti-cancer) anti-oxidants. But I do miss my coffee.....my sweet, sweet coffee. Give me a second.......ok I'm alright. Green tea has a similar amount of caffeine in it as coffee, but I've tried to drink more caffeinated soda in order to compensate anyway. Its been a rough 12 days so far I must admit, but I'm committed to seeing this thing through. More to come..........

Doctors or maybe just Medical Students

Anybody who has lived near or gone to school at a university with a medical school ever notice that the young docs like to walk around in their scrubs a lot (and sometimes white doctor coats)? Is this to advertise to everybody, "Hey I'm a doctor, or at least a future doctor"? I wonder if the guys do it more often than the ladies...Probably, guys are always scheming to get some action. Anyway I have noticed this trend lately. And I'm not just talking about people walking home in their scrubs right near the hospital. I'm talking about people eating out at restaurants, working out at the gym, etc. Is this just a mating call or a not so subtle boast of life status, or am I just crazy? Probably the latter....

My Atlantic City Poker Trip

So I went to Atlantic City this past weekend to play some texas hold 'em. I started playing $4/$8 limit at the Tropicana poker room at about 11 pm and didn't get up from the table until around 7:30 am the next morning. Good times. I was riding the roller coaster a bit, down $160 at one point after taking a series of beatings with pretty good starting hands. I clawed my way back to even partly with the help of a drunk guy with $300 to throw away. He sat down and immediately told the dealer she was "going too fast" and that he "had no time to think." He ended up raising and re-raising with comments like "whatever" and more importantly with no hand. It was fun while it lasted but eventually he got tired of losing and left. I ended the evening/morning up $100.

Since there was a No limit tourney starting in a mere 3 hours, I decided to enter. My winnings from the night before essentially paid my entry ($100 entry+$25 fee). However, I was only able to sleep for about a half hour before showering and coming back down to the poker room for the tournament. I was probably not in the best playing shape given my half hour of sleep...hmmmm. Anyway, 3rd hand of the tournament, I am on the button with pocket kings. I raise, get re-raised by a little old lady in the big blind, and call. The flop comes 4h, 7h, 9d. The kindly old lady then proceeds to push all-in.......hmmmm indeed. Third hand of the tournament, I've got kings, there is a flush draw on the board but just a draw.....I figured theres no way she was re-raising me with pocket 4's, 7's or 9's right?? So I called, and she didn't have pocket 4's 7's or 9's, she had pocket ACES. What are the freaking odds of that. The turn and the river did not help and I stood up prepared to leave. Fortunately, I hadn't noticed that I had 200 more chips than granny so I was left with 200 chips after 3 hands.....we started with 4000. That sucked. Somehow though I stayed alive, going all-in with A-9 just before the blinds came around again. Eventually I found myself still at the table after watching granny (aka the Terminator at this point according to everyone at the table) knock 4 other players out. She had trip Aces three times within the first hour....crazy. Only the final 18 players cashed and I unfortunately busted out around 30th place (out of 165). Not bad for a half hour sleep and a horrific start to the tournament. I may be heading back this weekend!

Hillary Skank and Chad Lowe go to celebrity splitsville

I bet Chad got tired of being referred to simply as Hillary Swank's husband instead of being hailed as that guy who played Becca's boyfriend on that show with Corky.

I hope Chad gets a nice chunk of change in the divorce settlement cause I don't imagine the residual checks from those Life Goes On re-runs are something he can retire on. Chad, make sure to hire a good attorney my man.

Today's playoff picks..not bad

1-1 today against the spread. If Palmer doesn't go down early maybe Cincinnati wins that game (maybe). I'll take my 1-3 record so far in the NFL playoffs and be happy that I'm not 0-4. 4 games next weekend? Sounds like a chance to move my record above .500. As a Chicago Bears fan, I'm already worried about the game on Sunday where they host the Panthers. Carolina's defense and offense both looked pretty damn good today. Hopefully, Rex Grossman can get that Bear offense goin'. As usual we shall see. My picks will come later in the week after proper time for analysis (or dartboard throwing).

Ok so far my football picks have been bad so far

I'm 0-3 against the spread so far with my posted picks. Not good. Today I'm sticking with my picks of both the underdogs, Carolina (+2.5) and Cincinatti (+3). Solid lead pipe locks???? Maybe not, but I'm due to pick a winner...

When all else fails....ELVIS PICS

Elvis attempting to mount a friend. "Hey little man, can I buy you a Cadillac?"


Looks like big E mugged a matador before this concert in Mexico City.


Elvis in the oval office...where he belonged, the other guy is Dick Nixon, he was a politician I'm told. I'm sure he was excited to meet Elvis.

Heading to Atlantic City tomorrow to play some Poker

I've played a lot of online poker at sites like absolutepoker.com, pokerparty.com, and pokersuperstars.com. I've only played a little bit in person at casinos so this weekend will be my real first test of my poker skeeeelz against live sunglass wearing (at least I hope there's at least one dude with shades on, I'm not a real big beleiver in the reading people's eyes thing) people.

I'm planning on playing some low limit hold 'em on Friday night at the Tropicana, probably nothing more than $3/$6 if possible. Unless I completely melt down on Friday night, I'm gonna enter a no-limit tourney Saturday morning.

Thus far my experiences playing poker online have been pretty streaky. I've gotten to the final table a couple times in some no-limit tournaments and done ok at times playing limit. However, I definitely have fell victim to the "tilt" syndrome that everybody talks about. Step One to going "on tilt" is where you lose one or two hands (usually for a lot of money/chips) by somebody catching a card (or two). Step Two of the syndrome involves calling and re-raising when you shouldn't for several hands in a row or for marginal hands over the course of the next hour or so. Within an hour of being on tilt, you can find yourself out of a lot of the money you just bought in for/won. Tilting sucks. My mission this weekend is to stay away from the old tilt and try to play tight enough in the no-limit tourney to stay in it long enough to have a shot at making money. We will see how it goes.

Master P on Dancing With the Stars

I watched the second half of this show tonight. It was my first time ever seeing the show. Master P apparently was taking the place of his son Lil Romeo (everybody needs a lil' somebody in their family/circle of friends) who dropped out. Not sure if they explained why young master Romeo dropped out but maybe it was to avoid the absolute laugh-fest that his pops Master P provided. It looked like Mater P was auditioning for some musical version of Frankenstein or something. He had a hat with a sparkly P on it and a baggy suit, but other than that the whole thing was very un-hip hop. I give him credit for stepping up and taking his son's place (he also offered some explanation about doing it for the folks affected by Hurricane Katrina, admirable...I guess, if his intention was to provide much-needed comedy for the folks down in his home state of Louisiana) but he looked very uncomfortable.

Unfortunately, I missed Kenny Mayne. At the end of the show they gave the judges final scores and Kenny Mayne and his partner were ranked second to last just one point about Franken-P and his partner. I'll have to check Sportscenter for a replay of Kenny Mayne's performance. He's just goofy and self-effacing enough to pull that show off, hope he stays on for a few weeks.

Google Earth

If you haven't done it already, download Google Earth here. What a cool program. Its a map of the earth using satellite photos. You can use it for all the same stuff you use yahoo maps and yahoo directory for.

Words I enjoy, followed by the dollar figure people like me associate with the word...

Try them on your blog:
mesothelioma $84.08 mesothelioma attorneys $80.93 mesothelioma lawyers $69.04 malignant pleural mesothelioma $55.95 Asbestos Cancer $54.17 mesothelioma symptoms $53.66 peritoneal mesothelioma $52.27trans union $51.91
$20 - $50
lung cancer $43.12 search engine optimization $30.19 mesothelioma diagnosis $28.70 home equity loans $20.06
$10 - $20
baines and ernst $18.47 consolidate loans $17.74 lexington law $17.68 lexington law firm $16.81 debt problems $16.28 register domain $15.74 home equity line of credit $15.61 affiliate programs $14.33 refinance $14.21 video conferencing $13.63 payday loans $13.21 credit counseling $13.02 asbestos $12.79 debt solutions $12.64 cash loans $12.13refinancing $12.09 broadband phone $12.08 debt management $11.86 fast loans $11.81 credit card processing $11.75 credit reports $11.59 making money on the internet $11.58 merchant account $11.46 line of credit $11.42 money magazine $11.27 adsense $11.13 credit counselors $11.02 identity theft $11.00 make money at home $10.84 free credit $10.76 cash advance $10.64 consumer credit counseling $10.63 freecreditreport $10.61 make money from home $10.35 free credit reports $10.26 make extra money $10.21 domain registration $10.19 adwords $10.08citifinancial $10.06 my fico score $10.01


My FICO score is much higher than 10.01 by the way, its at least 20-30. Also, my asbestos rash has been acting up lately and I'm seriously considering calling Baines and Ernst to see if they can take a look. The last thing I want is to have this asbetos rash flare up into a full blown case of mesothelioma...we all know how bad that can be...well actually I don't have any clue what mesothelioma is, but I'm pretty sure I don't want to get it. Probably requires more than a couple sprays of Lotrimin XL.

The Don and Mike Show

I have been listening to these guys for a long time and I was just checking out their website. They have audio clips from past shows and an update log. Good stuff. For those who have never heard of them, they are a nicer less lesbian stripper obsessed version of Howard Stern (and funnier in my opinion). Check them out here.

Rose Bowl post game musings

One thing the commentators on ESPN keep harping on in the post-game analysis is the subpar performance of Reggie Bush. Subpar????? The guy had 82 yds rushing with a td and 95 yds receiving. Thats 177 total yds not including the punt return and kick off return yds (which admittedly weren't anything special). Its a testament to how good Reggie Bush is, that the guy can almost go for the double-double of 100 yds receiving and rushing in a big game and people are saying he had an "Un-Reggie-Bush-like performance." Even with the bonehead fumble where he tried to pitch to an unsuspecting teammate, Bush had a great game.

The morons (Skippy and Woody) on "Cold Pizza" (which ESPN2 has conspicuously moved to 10 am EST) said that 1) Heisman voting should be changed to take place after the Bowl games and 2) Vince Young should have won it.......girls, girls, it was one game, let's not completely fall in love with Vince Young, and forget about the season-long love affair with Reggie Bush. The world of sports is so fickle these days.

O's fans rejoice.....Burnitz is a Pirate

From AP news:
PITTSBURGH (AP) -- "Jeromy Burnitz finalized his $6.7 million, one-year contract with the Pittsburgh Pirates after taking a physical Wednesday, but only after the unhappy Baltimore Orioles said the outfielder's agent backed out of a two-year deal.
Burnitz's Pirates contract calls for a $6 million salary this year and a $6 million mutual option for 2007 with a $700,000 buyout if the team declines its option. Baltimore thought Burnitz had agreed to a $12 million, two-year contract with the Orioles last week. "


Ok, somebody ought to let the GMs for Pittsburgh and Baltimore in on a badly-kept secret......Jeromy Burnitz sucks. He's not worth $6 million per year. The Orioles should be thanking their lucky stars that the hapless Pirates bailed them out on this one.

Hook em horns

Got to give all credit to Vince Young and the TexasLonghorns for ending USC's 34 game winning streak and talking the BCS championship. I can admit when I'm wrong and I was wrong about this game. Everyone including myself thought that the USC offense was unstoppable but it was Vince Young who was unstoppable in this game. One of the best single game performances I've ever seen in college football.
USC looked like they came out believing all of the hype that ESPN and the media had been endlessly spewing out for a month. This year's USC team was one of the greatest offenses of all time, but they are by no means one of the greatest teams of all time (despite what they were saying on Sportscenter all December with the hypothetical matchups between SC and national champion teams from the past).

Anyway, great game. Nice way to end the college football season. Congratulations to the Longhorns.

BCS Championship Game Final Score Prediction

I'm pretty jacked up for this game. I'm gonna stick with my prediction that SC covers the spread and say USC 37 - Texas 27. SC gets the 3-peat.


Looks like Lee Corso just picked Texas to win, that makes me feel even more confident about SC. Mark it down, yo!

NFL Coaching Vacancies

Lots of job openings for fat guys with headsets this offseason in the NFL. At the end of the regular season, the following teams fired their head coach:
1) St. Louis Rams
2) Oakland Raiders
3) Houston Texans
4) Minnesota Vikings
5) New Orleans Saints
6) Green Bay Packers
Additionally, the Lions fired Mooch late in the year and Dick Vermeil retired at the end of the year (and yes, he cried at the press conference, I think Vegas had the over/under on minutes before vermeil started balling at around 3 min, pretty sure he didn't cover).

Anyway that leaves 8 out of 32 teams with coaching vacancies. I am going to keep track of who gets hired where and the past NFL records of the hires. As far as past history goes, the NFL has seen waaaay too many re-tread coaches who never had success as a head coach conning their way into a new job. We'll see if this offseason is any different.

My pick for a quality coach who hopefully gets a chance somewhere is Mike Singletary. He was an intimidating and intelligent linebacker for the Bears and has experience as an assistant. I think he could bring a strong leadership presence to a head coaching position and I'm hoping he is among the new hires. Word is the Lions are talking about bringing him in. That would make for interesting matchups against his old team in Chicago in the NFC North. We'll all have to wait and see.

Somebody loan me $150K quick

How cool is that?

From Apnews.com
"Leonard Sonnenschein, president of the World Aquarium in St. Louis, holds We, a two-headed albino rat snake, Monday, Jan. 2, 2006. Sonnenschein has decided to sell the reptile, and bidding on e-Bay will start at $150,000."


I wonder if this thing could be exposed to some sort of gamma ray and turned into a huge 2 headed mutant monster snake. Obviously, I'm thinking big budget summer blockbuster villain type money for a movie deal.....the investment will pay for itself in no time.

Fearless Rose Bowl Game Prediction

So tomorrow night USC plays Texas for the whole barrel of tomatoes. As of now, the Men of Troy are favored by 7.5 pts. I see this game as at least a 10 point victory for USC so I will be taking them minus the points. Texas played in the very weak Big 12 and trounced every opponent they played. Texas's defense is definitely better than USC's defense, but the difference in the offenses is not close. USC will put more talent on the field than anything Texas faced in the Big 12 ( I do note that Texas beat Ohio st. early on but that was without Troy Smith as the starter at qb for the buckeyes, big difference). Anyway, should be high scoring, but USC wins by at least 10. Mark it down.

Isn't it a bit early for April Fool's jokes?

Patrick Swayze is apparently thinking about recording a rap album.

From Allhiphop.com:
"Swayze recently said he was experimenting with “rap rhythms as an emotional undercurrent for ballads.” Check out the story.

I'm as big a fan of "She's like the Wind" as anybody, but this could be career suicide for Swayze....on second thought I'm pretty sure Father Hood sounded the official death knell on Swayze's career, so.... what the hell , go for it Pat! Let's hear those rhymes.

Fearless playoff predictions, for entertainment purpose only of course

The First Weekend Matchups:

Washington at Tampa Bay (-2.5)
Jacksonville at New England (-7.5)
Carolina at New York Giants (-2.5)
Pittsburgh at Cincinnati (+2.5)


My Predictions:
1) I think Tampa Bay Bay covers easily against a hurting Mark Brunell at QB for the Redskins. A couple well-timed blitzes and Patrick Ramsey could be in there, a very scary thought for Skins fans.
2) New England beats Jacksonville but I don't think they'll cover the 7.5. The New England D is not what it used to be and this will be close. Brady and the Pats have been playing much better lately though so I see them winning by at least a field goal, maybe even yet another late Adam Vinatieri field goal (Adam V. is the most money kicker in the league right now hands down).
3) I'll take Carolina and the points. I know Tiki Barber had a great year but I still don't buy Eli Manning (especially in his first playoff appearance) and the NYG defense as playoff winners.
4) I was surprised to see that Cincinnati is an underdog in this one. I will take Cincinnati and the points all the way to the bank. Cincy isn't getting enough respect apparently since they have a solid running and passing game and a not too shabby defense. Pittsburgh eeked their way into the playoffs and is overrated based on past season performances. Cincy wins by 7 and covers with no problems.

Abramoff pleads guilty..this could get interesting

Here's a link to a story with the details: http://www.usatoday.com/news/washington/2006-01-03-abramoff_x.htm

He faces up to 30 years in prison and must pay restitution that may amount to 25 million. Not bad. This guy is an evil muthasucker from what I've seen, so I am happy to see he is not getting off easy. Now he will be cooperating with investigators looking for Congressional misconduct. We could see some resignations in COngress coming soon folks. Mr. Delay, would you care to be first?

Paul Rodgers is the new lead singer for Queen?

As in Paul Rodgers from Bad Company......that's embarrassing. I'm not really a Queen fan, but out of respect for Freddie Mercury they should either pack it in and retire or find somebody who did not front a cheeseball rock band like Bad Company to be their lead singer. I was watching the halftime show for the Fiesta Bowl and they showed a lame performance by "Queen with Paul Rodgers." The worst part was where Paul sang "Queen will Queen will rock you!" Just plain ugly all around.

This is whacky

From Espn.com-
"Former Ohio State running back Maurice Clarett was accused of displaying a gun and robbing two people in an alley behind a bar early Sunday, the latest trouble for the Buckeyes star who left the school in disgrace and failed to gain early entry into the NFL."

Read the entire story here:
http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/news/story?id=2277173&campaign=rss&source=ESPNHeadlines


I think Maurice and Jeff Reardon should team up if they get over their recent legal troubles. Jeff could be the guy who goes inside the liquor store while Maurice waits at the door. Then Jeff could pull out a baseball and tell the store clerk he's gonna get 90+ mph of split-finger fastball right between the eyes if he doesn't hand over the cash in the register. Once the clerk hands over the cash, Jeff uses his throwing accuracy to toss the stacks of cash to Maurice at the door. Then Maurice uses his skills as a former star runningback to get away with the dough. I guess that still leaves Jeff inside the store with no getaway driver, but they could work on that.
Jeff and Maurice......the coppers don't stand a chance!

Pass that Chronic-WHAT-cles of Narnia

http://www.youtube.com/watch.php?v=zLElfJ9YCh0

This SNL video has been making the internet rounds so I figured I would post a link. Funny shit. Mr. Pibb and Red Vines equals CRAZY DELICIOUS!

Google Adsense

I have to hand it to the boys over at Google Adsense. As I write this my banner ads are 1) A survey asking people to vote whether or not they think Kenny Chesney is gay and 2) An advertisement for "legal Kenny Loggins downloads."

My thoughts on these ads are as follows:
Ad #1-----Of course Kenny Chesney is gay, he wrote a song called "You had me at Hello." He either has a vagina or he's gay (more power to him if he is btw). Case closed.

Kenny C. (gay? Nooo WAY, just look at the picture)

Ad#2-----Why would anyone attempt to illegally download Kenny Loggins songs? Isn't this like trying to rob a lemonade stand with a gun? If you get caught, the penalty sucks (ie armed robbery charges), and if you don't get caught all you get are a bunch of lame ass Kenny Loggins songs (ie a couple lemons and some loose change).


Lil' Kenny L.

Happy New Year World

Well folks, its 2006. So I figure its high time I list my resolutions for the coming year:

1) Learn to break concrete slabs with fists.
2) Learn to break concrete slabs and/or doors with feet.
3) Finally get that kidney operation I've always wanted.
4) Learn how to play the pan flute.
5) Discover myself, in new and...erotic ways.
6) Listen to more smooooooth jazz, cause Kenny G is GOD.
7) Play at least 18 holes of golf with TV's John Stamos.
8) Win an MC battle by spitting the illest isht on the mic.
9) Gain weight.
10) Learn to iron.